Extreme Home Makeover
Bush Trades Louisiana Spaces with the French
Baton Rouge - In an extraordinary change of stance in foreign policy, President Bush has made a strategic move today to restore the Katrina ravaged state of Louisiana. White House spokesperson Scott McClellan announced in an uncharacteristically elloquent and unliarly manner that a deal was sealed at an "emergency 'meeting' aboard the Air Force One, when Bush was dutifully taking an aerial tour of the disaster zones so that he may think in presidential comfort as to what logical steps he could take immediatedly after being closer to God at an altitude of 30,000ft, far from the grasp of the underworld, and after Cheney calls."
The world witnessed an elated Jacques Chirac at a curiously unceremonous handover. "This is a very emotional day in History and we are happy to say, maison bienvenue!" said President Chirac.
Bush highlighted that this is a mutually beneficial reversal of the Louisianna Purchase. He said that it shouldn't be long before residents of Louisianna will have a decent home again. "My friend Jack understands fully that this is a fixer-upper. The French are renown for their uh, exquisite taste and... exquiste... fashion. Them artsy types are a very creative people. Jack has assured me that he will fix everything.
Republicans are touting this as "possibly the brilliant-est" move in the History of any American president's dealings with a national crisis. One was quoted saying, "Instead of spending billions and billions on relief and stuff, we just made a sweet $25 million profit, more than twice what we paid. "
Fox News calls it a "Long overdue temporay buy back." Their senior political analysts were speculating that Hurricane Rita may prompt Bush to do the same, after Texas gets hit. "We have good relations with Mexico and this creates another unique opportunity for America to annex what is rightfully our after normalcy retuns. We need to continue to support our troops and show the world how a real democracy is built."
Baton Rouge - In an extraordinary change of stance in foreign policy, President Bush has made a strategic move today to restore the Katrina ravaged state of Louisiana. White House spokesperson Scott McClellan announced in an uncharacteristically elloquent and unliarly manner that a deal was sealed at an "emergency 'meeting' aboard the Air Force One, when Bush was dutifully taking an aerial tour of the disaster zones so that he may think in presidential comfort as to what logical steps he could take immediatedly after being closer to God at an altitude of 30,000ft, far from the grasp of the underworld, and after Cheney calls."
The world witnessed an elated Jacques Chirac at a curiously unceremonous handover. "This is a very emotional day in History and we are happy to say, maison bienvenue!" said President Chirac.
Bush highlighted that this is a mutually beneficial reversal of the Louisianna Purchase. He said that it shouldn't be long before residents of Louisianna will have a decent home again. "My friend Jack understands fully that this is a fixer-upper. The French are renown for their uh, exquisite taste and... exquiste... fashion. Them artsy types are a very creative people. Jack has assured me that he will fix everything.
Republicans are touting this as "possibly the brilliant-est" move in the History of any American president's dealings with a national crisis. One was quoted saying, "Instead of spending billions and billions on relief and stuff, we just made a sweet $25 million profit, more than twice what we paid. "
Fox News calls it a "Long overdue temporay buy back." Their senior political analysts were speculating that Hurricane Rita may prompt Bush to do the same, after Texas gets hit. "We have good relations with Mexico and this creates another unique opportunity for America to annex what is rightfully our after normalcy retuns. We need to continue to support our troops and show the world how a real democracy is built."
1 Comments:
Very Funny, I especially loved the part about being closer to God. (Or doG for the dyslexic)
By Anonymous, At 1:09 AM
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